Wounding and the Wounded - feral cats
The cat in the pic was my neurotic cat who suffered all her life - I had her from baby like bottle fed so she was safe but either in her first few days of life or generations of DNA trauma was stuck in her terrified little body. She was a sweetie and is at rest now but it broke my heart she never felt safe... 

Some people are that way too

Thoughts on wounding. You don't get to tell someone they're not wounded. Whether you meant it or not, whether they believe you are at the cause or not, that's not the question. Someone is wounded.

This may be completely oversimplified but this is my viewpoint

I don't get to tell my cat that I didn't mean to step on its tail. I stepped on its tail, I did a thing, and she's hurting. It's not my job to explain I didn't see her or why, and it's not my job to try to help her understand she needs to try to stop getting underfoot and putting herself in that position!

Have you ever seen a feral animal? These are animals so wounded by their past or were raised by another animal carrying generations of wounding and simply passing it along. It believes people are unsafe and the entire world is unsafe. It lives in fear and terror, constantly triggered by everything around it. Sometimes the external manifestation of this fear and terror is anger if you dare come near, if you got too close. Other times they run away at the site of anyone and stay locked in their fear.

Some people are just like that, they were either so deeply wounded or raised by someone so deeply wounded they live constantly triggered. They either recoil in fear or lash out and anger or maybe a little of both depending on how safe they feel or the depth of their wound

Some feral animals can learn some humans are safe especially the ones that come feed them and give them what they need. Some humans are like that too, they can hold it together and suppress their wounding if they're getting something they need.

Sometimes a feral animal will trust enough to be what some considered "tamed" or fixed, recovered.

Sometimes they'll only recover far enough to get what they need, eat their food and then run away or sometimes even lash out if you try to touch them, to show them love and affection. You wind up with some scratches and lesson learned! Well hopefully ...

Sometimes it takes a few of these experiences before we give up and realize this is one of those wounded feral cats that will remain outdoors. This is one of those that will come get their food, run away, and if we try to get too close we ourselves will be wounded by their wounding.

Sometimes they'll come on your porch and may even be rehomed. We've had several rescue cats in our home and helped many others. In my experience so far there's generally always some underlying, residual fear that can find comfort and a measure of feeling safe but only in their environment and only with "their people" or sometimes with whoever their people consider safe people because they've trusted you enough and had enough good experiences to understand not all humans are unsafe. They've recovered enough to understand that you are safe and whoever you bring into their world is also safe because you only have safe people in your life.

We had a colony of these feral cats living in the woods by our home in Florida. We used to foster cats and rescued quite a few through these years.

This is just ...
... Life observations and stories by Dee

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